You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
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