Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
They have beer where we have blood.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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