That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
