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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK

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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready

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• (740): View more from Ohio

  i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.

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• (903): View more from Texas

  This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.

  (254): View more from Texas

  Jealous?

  (903): View more from Texas

  Very.

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.

  (662): View more from Mississippi

  Challenge accepted. See you in hell.

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• (515): View more from Iowa

  you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny

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• 

  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  ...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.

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• (479): View more from Arkansas

  These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom

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• (949): View more from California

  Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.

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