You can't motorboat a personality
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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