They have a pepper shaker for pot.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
