Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize
