it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize