Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
