Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I love you. Go after that dick
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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