It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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