i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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