I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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