We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
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