The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize