UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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