I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize
