she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
The power of my boobs compel you
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
