Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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