I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Someone came in the potted fern
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
