FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
