I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
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