you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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