Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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