If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Randomize
