He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
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I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
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also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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