I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize
