what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
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