You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize