if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
love makes seman taste better
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
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