If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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