NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
Randomize
