I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
My ATM looks so different sober.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
