why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
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