I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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