Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
