He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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