barbara walters just said penis...
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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