theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
