I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
