Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
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