Don't make out with my wife yet
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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