After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
