physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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