There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
