go do what you do best...puke behind churches
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
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He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
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And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.