he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Randomize
