JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
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