Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize