you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Randomize
